|
At Castle Doom a slender figure hurries to her evil Master and Mistress... |
|
|
"My Lord Doom, Lady Fear... I saw MiskatonicNick taken from Jabba's Palace and Casino by the Joes... but he has been freed by the Olsens."
|
"You have done well Number 1 Daughter..." "Yes, Doom commends you on your achievements. Let us keep this unholy alliance under careful observation... release the flying monkeys!" "Erm... you had them all executed when they went rabid and ate the Wicked Witch of the West's face off, Victor."
|
|
"Oh,
yes. Doom remember now... oh, how we laughed. Well, strap a jetpack to |
|
"WOO HOO! We are the greatest!"
"HALT!"
"I said out of that jeep... NOW!"
"What? And you're listening to that bagheaded loon now? Good grief Ashley...
... uhoh... |
"You honestly didn't believe escape was going to be that easy did you? Now get out of that jeep with your hands where we can see them..."
(thinks... hang on a moment that looks like... hmmm, well, it's a plan... albeit a drastic one...) "Dammnit Ashley, why didn't you steal the jeep with the honking great big cannon on the back!?!" "Hey, twins - I have a cunning plan; reverse the jeep... now!" "ok"
|
|
"Right, if you're not out of that vehicle within the next 10 seconds..." "Well, that was a crap plan, you bagheaded loon!" "Yeah and... eeeewwww - the Jeep's beginning to shake and vibrate... and the doctor... the doctor's... what the fu..."
|
"Ohmigod Ashley... you've run over a doctor!" "Ah, but not just any Doctor, Mary-Kate..."
|
|
"As I was saying... that wasn't just any doctor; that was Dr Bruce Banner and I reckon parking a big ol'jeep on him is going to get him pretty angry..." "So?" "C'mon Mary-Kate; Bruce Banner? The Incredible Hulk? You won't like me when I'm angry?" "I'm not that keen on you anyhow..." "Hang on, so how is pissing of the Hulk gonna help us? |
|
|
"1... 2... 3..." |
|
"GRRRR! WHO PARK BIG CAR ON HULK? HULK MAD! HULK THROW BIG CAR AWAY!" "Ooooooooohhhhhh ccccrrraaaapppppp!" "Hang on tight girls - this might be a rough ride!" "No kidding, you great big dickhead!" |
|
|
"GRRR... HULK THINK PUNY SOLDIERS PARKED BIG CAR ON HULK! PAH! HULK SMASH PUNY SOLDIERS!"
"oh crap... medic! MEDIC!" |
"Whoa! Look at that sucker fly! Come on men, mount up - we've gotta..." "...erm... sir? I think we've got a slight problem..." "Eh? What are you on about Lowlight? Oh..."
|
"Weeeeeeee!" "crap crap crap crap crap crap crap"crap crap crap crap crap crap crap" "Bloody hell you great twit - that f***ing green b*st*rd's launched us into f***ing orbit!" "Now now, Mary-Kate - I've told you a million times; do not exaggerate..." "crap crap crap crap crap crap crap" "Oh no? What the f***'s that then over there, Mr Bagheaded genius?"
|
|
|
|
"Captain's Log Supplemental. Due to an overload of technobabble in the port nacelle, we have been flung back in time to the early 21st Century; a time of pollution, war and internet porn..." "Captain! Unknown ship off the starboard bow... it seems to be somekind of fossil burning vehicle... piloted by the Olsen Twins! " "What! Dammnit; I knew another lame time travel story would stink but not this badly! Let's get the hell out of here; maximum warp to Paramount/Viacom HQ... we're gonna shove some photon torpedoes up Berman and Braga before they ruin this Trek franchise any further!" "But sir, this is actually a better plot than our last movie." |
|
|
"Well, okay then, Mary-Kate... you have a point." "But how the hell are we gonna get down?" "Erm, gravity?" "crap crap crap crap... we'll be smashed to pieces!" "Look, when I said I had a plan I didn't actually say it was a particularly good one... still, let's face it; there's not a lot else which can go wrong in the few seconds before our splattery deaths..."
|
|
"...eh?"
"oh crap... cheap handcuffs..." |
"Ohmigod... we're gonna plummet..." "ooooo bugger... some of us before others..." |
|
|
|
|
|
