Meanwhile, up a back alley in Toyville's sleazier district...

"Hey, sailor-boy - see anything you'd like?" "Ack ack ack... that I do...

... ack ack ack... I yam what I yam!"

"Did you hear that Willow?" "Sure did Cowboy, the oldest and tackiest joke so far in this story, and that's saying something!" "No - more gunshots echoing over Toyville... I wonder how many more heroes are dead now because of me..." "Hey, Cowboy... you shouldn't talk like that..." "It's the truth! What kind of hero am I? I let down Buffy, lost Aeryn, all those heroes who rescued me; they're all dead or prisoners. Then there's Daphne - hell only knows what happened to her!" "You've still got me, Cowboy."

"Yeah, and a fat lot of good I'm gonna do you..." "Don't... I feel safe with you around, Cowboy; whatever you may think you're a hero...

... you're my hero..." "What, but I thought..."

"Less thinking, Cowboy... now just shut up and kiss me..."

"Oh, Cowboy... what interesting tan lines you have..." "yeah... blame Dragon Models for that but I'm fully articulated... and I've got bendy fingers!" "oooo... *giggle*"

"Oh God... YES! Oh god... I only wish we actually had molded genatalia!" But the afterglow isn't exactly warm...

"What's up Cowboy... you were great; a REAL hero!" "It's over, Willow." "But we've only just..." "No, I mean I'm over. Everyone who's been around me has ended up dead or captured by the evil toys. I can't risk that happening to you now that I... I..." "oh Cowboy..." "I'm going to give myself up." "... but..."

"No buts, sweet Willow. I've been thinking about this for a while; it's the only thing I can do which might protect you." "Well... if you think it's for the best, but let's at snuggle some more first..."